Learning to be myself

This blog came into being in late 2010.  It was my first holiday season as a married lady, my first in my own home, and my first time realizing that I was never going home; I hadn't lived there since right after my 18th birthday [when I joined the military], but it never occurred to me that I wouldn't go back.  So, I decided I needed to do something to keep my family in the loop.  Emails are boring, Facebook is impersonal, and Twitter doesn't let me use that many characters; but blogging works.

A year later, and I found myself in unfamiliar territory.  The blog had changed from familial updates to something more of a hobby, but this hobby wasn't me.  I found myself gravitating toward these mega-blogs, full of projects and crafts and recipes and kids and perfect lives.  They overwhelmed me with their impersonal attitudes, but I thought all blogs were like this.  So I mimicked.  I tried to art and craft, host give aways, write humorous articles about daily life; it was all I had ever seen.  All I knew was to try and build a fan base, collect readers and followers, publicize my posts to my maximum ability.

About a month ago, it hit me; that style just isn't me.  I am not a DIY recipe-making crafting kid-chasing farm-loving herb-growing kind of gal.  I honestly don't even like reading about that stuff most of the time. So why was I trying to become something that I'm not?  I still don't know.

I've made a resolution.  This blog is now for me: my interests, my hobbies, my life.  I will never become a mega-blogger because I have no interest and spouting off what others want to hear.  So from now on, I post what I like.  Maybe I take too many pictures; well, I love photography and showcasing my meagre abilities.  Maybe I talk about thrifting too much; well, it's a passion of mine that I seriously enjoy.  Maybe I talk about personal issues; well, it can be hard to find people who relate on a daily basis, but here I know I have support.  So sue me.

I still like give-aways, and I still like guest blog posts.  I'll still post Bookish Sundays because I am the world's biggest book worm, and I may participate in link-ups that capture my interest.  I think having varying points of views on a forum is necessary to break up the monotony.  But I'm done reading mega-blogs [except for one or two that I actually like], and am hoping to make legitimate friends out of people who share common interests, or who are so different from me that they're interesting.  And a little of the in-between.

So you can expect tons of pictures, thrifting expeditions, and travel posts.  Another facet of this blog is going to be more opinion based posts; I've kept my head down [on the internet and in real life] for years, but I'm over it.  And if you don't like where this blog is heading, I promise I'm not wounded.  I'm sure the mega-bloggers would love to boost their numbers.

p.s. I think is my first post ever that didn't include at least one picture.  I feel kind of naked without one.

p.s.s.  Thanks to Miss Patricia, LWLH, J, and Kendall for showing me that you can be happy and still be yourself.  They may not know it, but their blogs have inspired me to move in this new direction.  Thank you, ladies, for your support and for being your wonderful selves!

Welcome to 2012

I feel so out of touch with the world.  I never realized how being disconnected from the internet and virtual ability to contact my family & friends leaves one so...lost?  Restless?  I’m actually quite ashamed at how dependent I am on my computer to keep me entertained, and am dreading the legitimate possibility that I will not have internet in our home for quite some time.  I hate not being able to get ahold of my mom, see what my brothers are up to, laugh at my dad, and watch as my friends and their families continue to grow.  Plus I hate not being able to do this.  I do love my blog [perhaps a tad too much].  But Germany is a learning process, and one such process I have recently had brought to my attention is: each village has a limited number of internet hook ups [due to the fact that it’s underground?].  Just because the previous tenants had internet does not guarantee the new tenants [us] that same ability, and it actually looks like we fall under that category.  Oh. No. Looks like I’ll be doing a lot of traveling to coffee shops to get my fix.

On to the real subject.  Believe it or not, that little rant has a purpose.  We recently arrived into the New Year [2012?  Already?], and this holiday actually makes me more thankful and thoughtful than Thanksgiving.  Here is a quick flashback at how my life has changed over the past ten years, and a tiny list of New Year’s resolutions [which I have never done].

Ten years ago: Attending middle school in Glasgow, Kentucky.  Wow. 

Six years ago: Finishing my last year of high school in Minnesota.  Getting ready to enter the Air Force.

Five years ago: Learning Korean in the Air Force in California, and missing my family so so much.  Also starting the time period of growing into an adult, making tons of mistakes, and realizing that I’m not invincible.  Not a pleasant year.

Three years ago:  Starting to date Tim Anderson, and would not have believed we would end up married.

Two years ago: Deployed to Kuwait in the Middle East.  Same year Timmy & I married, I discharged from the military, and we gained our two pups.  I can’t believe it’s already been that long!

One year ago: Living in California, planning our belated reception, no clue we will be in Germany by the end of that year.

Now: Settled into our home in a new country, keeping myself occupied with cooking, crafts, traveling and the works.  I can’t believe the person I was even five years ago, and how much I’ve changed.  Ready to see what this year brings us!

Resolutions:

-Be satisfied.  There are billions of people in the world who couldn’t even imagine living my life.  I am happy, healthy, and alive.  There is no need to want or desire more. [This would be my reaction to my constant desire to fill my time with internet.  Needs to stop]

-Write more letters.  I’m so far away from my family and friends, but lacking technology shouldn’t stop me from keeping in contact.  It’s been quite a while since I’ve penned more than my name on a receipt, but I’m sure I can manage.

-Keep a journal.  I could argue that this blog is somewhat of a journal, but there are tons of things and pictures that occur every day that I don’t think should be shared with everyone.  I would like to keep an actual journal of amazing events, thoughts, ideas, etc. that can be read in the future or by our children of a time in a foreign country.  Cool, yeah?

-Get a polaroid camera.  Much easier/cooler/unique to put those pictures in a journal than getting digital ones printed.

-Learn German.  I am a firm believer in learning languages, and speaking the host countries’ words.  If you’re in America, you can speak whatever you want since we don’t have a national language.  If I’m in Germany, there’s no excuse not to learn German.

-Excel in school.  This might actually be the toughest of them all.  I’m dreading the start of my online semester, and have no desire to actually study or do homework or anything.  I joined the military instead of college for a reason.  But it needs to be done, and I need to do it well.

-Be kind.  It can be very easy [for me especially] to become extremely self centered and self focused.  I tend to be brusque with others when I’m in a hurry, wait to speak instead of listening, and think only of myself when...well, thinking.  Time to turn that focus outward.  I’m too old to expect everyone to think only of/about me.

-Repurpose a piece of furniture.  I've been wanting to do this for a while, but with the move thought it would be impractical.  This year, it's happening.

Do you have any New Year's resolutions?  Any favorite DIYs or projects that you have always wanted to do, but just haven't gotten around to yet?  You should probably do them.  After all, isn't this year the end of the world or something?!

To end the post, here are some pictures of my own New Year's Eve party.  Hope you had a great one as well and have an amazing 2012!